Slaughter your world! (and kick a puppy!)
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Fresh, nubile pumpkins await their transformation.
Stephanie holds their fate in her hands....
I have all the right tools for the job.
Just call me the eviserator.
Mmmmmm. Tasty eviseration.
Around here, we don't need costumes to be scary.
Gutting nubile corpses is tough work, even for brutal women....
Mmmmmm... tasty pumpkin guts.
I take sinful delight in my work. Really, who wouldn't?
Stephanie has a surgeon's skill paired with a grave digger's sense of urgency. It's a deadly combination.
There's more where THIS came from....
I'm TELLING you: STEPHANIE HAS MAD PUMPKIN SKILLZ!!!!
The brutality takes shape....
Yes, EVIL has a face....
... and a not-so-steady aim.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... Gotta love that new pumpkin smell!!!
The resemblence is STRIKING.
Sometimes I even scare MYSELF.
And then I see THIS FACE: and I am truly TERRIFIED!!!!
Stephanie's reaction is far less dramatic. I think she's still in shock.
I, however, have moved quite quickly from awe to shock to horror to pure, unadulterated batshit-crazy lunacy. Pumpkins have that effect on me.
Later, we teach Tessa to feed off the remains. It builds character.
Stephanie's pumpkin takes the left watch.
Mine takes the right.
Our terrifying creations complete their journey from nubile, fresh-faced pumpkins to brutal jack o' lanterns in just one night.
They'll thank us in the morning.
Money I've saved in the last three months while being insured:
Hospital costs saved: $896.94 (two more claims for over $800 are still pending)
Meds costs saved: $611.51
That's $1508.45 saved on medical costs in three months. Just three months.
I wasn't joking when I said these costs-to-keep-breathing - pre-employement - were literally killing me.
And, of course, I HAVE paid costs out of pocket. That's just what insurance paid. Total out of pocket for the last three months is still: $475.46
Which is still 1/4 of what I was paying in medical costs pre-employment.