WEB MARSHALL [TM] (Dude, I Couldn't *Make* This Shit UP!!)

My flight here in Milwaukee is delayed by 13 minutes, but still scheduled to arrive in Madison on time. Fascinating.

I've been passing the time online checking up on blogs that I was unable to access at Dayton International Airport, which also has a WiFi service.

What's that, you ask? Why wasn't I able to access my blogroll?

IT IS BECAUSE MY BLOGROLL IS FULL OF FILTHY PORN!!!

And so Dayton's Web Marshall (TM) took me to task!


My favorite part is the fine print that says, "Your attempt to access this site has been recorded."

Next thing you know, I'll be hauled to prison on pornography charges for accessing my blog. Filthy fucking liberal blogs and their Lesbian Feminist Boxers!!!

Even those left-leaning "literary criticism" blogs are full of pornographers!



And Pandagon's been censored for - among other things - using the words "breast" (without mention of "cancer") and "lesbian."

Dirty, Dirty Pandagon!



And apparently, Livejournal - all of it - is just Dirty Dirty Dirty.


Filthy pornographers!!

Is our terror of young people cruising for porn in the airport really so great that we're willing to censor our media like DAY International is a communist state?

Oh, hell, who am I kidding? Just look at all the other shit we've been encouraged to put up with in the name of "terror."

Ohhhhh Pandagon is so full of Scary Angry Women, and that Matt Cheney, man, what a terrorist pornographer! I tremble!