Thursday, November 29, 2007

Praise Be

I got my health reimbursement check today.

Also, my endo loves me and filled out my paperwork so I can get one of these. Yay! I'm just getting my bloodwork done, and they'll start negotiations with my insurance. Which now appears to be working.

My A1c is a stupid 6.6, which, yes, is perfectly acceptable for a t1 (anything under 7 is good), but dammit man, I had a 5.9 last time! 5.9, people!! That's the A1c of a NORMAL PERSON.

Yes, I'm shooting for under 6 for my next visit. Might be tricky, but hopefully the pump will help, too.

Overall, she was once again very happy and impressed with me, which I find... really strange after my terrible endo experience in Chicago. I'm getting all of this praise for my great A1c and 110/62 blood pressure, instead of having somebody beat me down about my weight at every visit and try to peddle me more drugs (yes, I'm still only taking insulin. My last doctor tried to get me on metformin and something for high blood pressure. High blood pressure? 110/62? WTF? Yeah).

I was dreading this appointment like you just can't believe. I didn't realize how those horrible Chicago visits had trained me into believing that visiting the endocrinologist was the worst thing in the world. I always left there feeling beaten down, defeated, like I was a completely worthless person with an out of control weight "problem" and appetite who had to be heavily medicated and was going to get her feet chopped off any day. Getting all that bubbly praise today was just so weird. I wanted to cry all over again.

Stupid diabetes. Why can't doctors treat their patients with respect? We're not all actively trying to get our feet chopped off, you know. Some of us work really fucking hard every day to do well. We'd appreciate some help. And a kind word of acknowledgement that pulling off even a 6.6 isn't easy.

3 comments so far. What are your thoughts?

Travis said...

You're AWESOME.. I so need to find one of those stickers that says that.. like the kind teachers use.. and put them all over your laptop tomorrow


AnnaB said...

I don't think anyone realizes how hard it is to deal with diabetes, esp. t1. Managing diabetes can be like a whole other fucking JOB - no one needs criticism on top of it! I'm really glad you found a nice endo - I bet it makes life a lot easier.

Coincidentally, my husband (a t1) went for his endo visit today. He was so happy when the numbers looked good, because it meant that there would be no well-meaning "talks." But the truth is, sometimes the numbers don't pan out no matter what you do. Why can't anyone, esp. doctors, understand that?

It would be nice to expect a doctor to empathize, not to judge. And for those who have to go to doctors frequently, it takes a lot of balls/ovaries to deal with the criticism. Best of luck.

Amylia said...

i am SO glad you have an endo who gets it and praises you for your work! i have met nothing put pricks here in taiwan and have had my share of bad endos in the states. i'm returning to the us in part b/c diabetes care for t1's in taiwan SUCKS and i am working so hard and feel like shit every time i go to the doctor. it's so maddening.

we deserve respect, and i'm glad you're getting it. my docs here only comment on my weight. my last doc told me all i needed to do was meet another foreigner and join his gym (this was after i told him i excericse every day). but i digress... congrats on your A1C. i admire that!