Thursday, August 07, 2008


Work weeks when I have big projects due tend to be kind of crappy weeks, yo. I missed both of my workday workouts because of work meetings and was hopped up on too much diet Coke, which meant I was far more jumpy and anxious than usual. Which means I'm not sleeping well. And I've been avoiding the cardio sessions at the gym since I got the pump because I knew that leveling for a cardio session was going to be a fucking bitch. So I avoided it.

The one awesome thing I had control over this week was my going-out habit that I've been working to crack (once or twice a week at Chipotle is a serious problem). I'm stunned to say this is the second week in a row that I haven't given in, mainly due to that whole budgeting thing. Doing so well last month has made me want to do good this month. Also, I have a hankering to go bowling *and* see a movie this weekend. Which requires said fun money. I'm also putting away to buy an elliptical for the apartment. Winter isn't far away, and having it around when I'm too cold to go to the gym will be great for my peace of mind and my sleep.

I did finally do a cardio session at the gym today after work, the first with the pump, and it was predictably shitty. I decreased my basal by 75% and ate three lifesavers and bottomed out twice. I hung on for 35 min instead of the regular 45 and then called it a night. Cardio at the end of the day just kills my sugar.

So I'm thinking of doing something like a -25% 2 hours before, -50% 1 hour before and -75% during to bring my sugar up enough to work out.

It's just a matter of getting the numbers right, and sadly, and fucking frustratingly, it's just a matter of trial and error. And I fucking hate it. But the alternative? The alternative is to just hide in your room and just not do anything cause it's just too hard, too much trouble, because failing is easy and discomfort is hard.

And who the fuck wants that?

But man, I fucking hated it. The worst part is over, though. I went to the gym for the first time on the pump, and didn't pass out. Honestly, any day I don't pass out I should count as a good day. Sometimes I don't think I give myself enough credit for how well I've done (with the incredible support of Steph and the Old Man and Jenn before them). I mean, seriously, an A1c of 5.9 at one point, and never above 7. Let's just hurrah over that, shall we?

Anyhow, back to the fucking book.

Resolutions for next week:

1) Drink less diet Coke
2) Get to the gym for the designated 4 timeslots, come highs, lows, or hellish waters
3) Write 5,000 words of Black Desert, because seriously, this shit needs to get done. I've got another series I need to sell. I have no idea why this fucker won't write itself. I think I'm lacking in proper motivation (we haven't even started editing the first book yet, so I think I'm being lazy. Quitting WoW, however, resulted in a sudden flurry of activity, so I'm gunning to have it done mid September).
4) Keep on keepin' on

Tra la.

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